Lesson of a Life on the Move

     I consider myself a spiritual person.  I believe that God has a plan for my life and that all of the experiences over the past 14 years are to make me into the person I'm intended to be.  This move, however, has been by the far the most rewarding and frustrating.  I'm ready already to find out what the plan is!  Not many people take the time to make sense of the decisions you make, the people you meet, or where you happen to lay your head.  That's all I've done in seven moves over  the 14 years I've been married to "the military."
     I always knew Indiana was not the place I wanted to spend my life.  So fortunately I met my husband and he quickly proceeded to move me 14 hours away to Fayetteville, NC home of Ft. Bragg.  What a change for a small town girl from Indiana!  I remember very clearly walking on post for the first time and just staring, without trying to be obvious, at all of the people in uniform.  I'd never seen so much camo in my life!  Of course over time I grew accustomed to living in a military town and actually grew to enjoy the benefits of living close to post: commissary (grocery), PX (Walmart), and all the free activities.
     Ft. Bragg turned out to be the place where KC and I learned to be a married couple.  That may sound odd to say but many newlyweds never have that chance.  We were far away from family and friends and therefore we had nowhere to run if something went awry.  We learned to depend on each other, communicate openly and honestly, and always place the other's need first.  Ft. Bragg is also the place we learned to be parents.  We had Avery and all of our family was hundreds of miles away.  We learned to share the parenting responsibility.  We didn't leave Avery with a sitter until she was nearly two.  That's not exclusively because we were overprotective; we didn't know anyone well enough.  I'm not saying any of this was easy; it most definitely wasn't.  We were in debt to our eyeballs and barely making ends meet.  We learned to be frugal, to prioritize, and to spend time together without spending money.
     Knoxville, TN is the place we learned to just be still and let God do his thing.   This is where we found our wonderful church and second family.  Knoxville is the place where my kidney disease ultimately acquired a name and where I was given a second chance at life thanks to my unbelievable husband!  Now don't get me wrong, I wouldn't want to live there again but I truly miss my "family" and the connections we made.  It's hard as a military spouse to constantly change.  Friends, jobs, doctors, hairdressers the list is endless.  This is the first place I was willing to open myself to friendship other than those I'd left in Indiana.  I finally learned that making new friends didn't mean forgetting my oldest ones.  Avery made one of her dearest "boyfriends" and plans are in the works for an arranged wedding:)  Whenever we go to Knoxville it's like going home.
     Living in Kentucky was quite an experience and I miss it everyday.  Kentucky taught me what it meant to be a mommy, a wife, and a woman without feeling guilty that they weren't intertwined.  I was able to take time for myself and hang out with my awesome group of girls and do things for myself.  I'd forgotten over the past 10 years to take time for me and it was refreshing and beneficial for my entire family.  We lived in a great neighborhood, the kind you see in sappy movies, with great neighbors.  I learned to relax, enjoy the moment, and the people who were in my life.  I got to experience one of my secret wishes which was hosting a house full of kids!  It sounds corny but I always wanted to be "THAT" mom: open door policy, snacks on the counter, and doors slamming.  I learned that being only three hours from your family was a perfect distance and was able to enjoy many events I'd missed out on previously.  As a family we learned that saving has its benefits as we were able to take trips to Colorado and Disney.
     Now here I sit in Vancouver, WA and I can't help but wonder what I'm supposed to learn.  What is the plan for this place?  I already know it's for me to become healthy and enjoy the benefits of fitness.  I believe that this place is supposed to make us appreciate each other and the beauty around us.  There is no way someone can come here and not awe at the natural beauty.  I, however, can't help but feel a bit lost.  I'm unemployed and having a difficult time even getting an interview.  I don't know who I'm supposed to be or what I'm supposed to do if I'm not working.  So I guess for now I'll just do what I've been doing: exercising, errands, cooking, cleaning, parenting, and spousing.  I know there is a personal lesson to learn I just may not be ready to learn it.